2009年3月7日 星期六
為什麼是「出櫃」?
中國小孩從小就聽父母說床底下有怪物,如果不聽話怪物就會出來吃人,為什麼中國的怪物是躲在床底下?因為我們的床架底下是架空的,不像國外的床架底下通常是做實心,或者有很多抽屜可以放東西(當然現在很多床架都是國外來的、國外做的、國外的設計,自然就比較不能體會),所以外國父母口中的怪物就不是躲在床底下。
##CONTINUE##
看來外國的怪物比較幸運,反正床底下不是個可以舒服躲藏的地方,所以牠們躲衣櫃裡邊,也因此外國小孩稱牠們做 closet monster。那大人心中的怪物呢?兒時的怪物躲在衣櫃久了,怪物也是會腐壞的(笑),所以就變成 a skeleton in the closet 化作一堆白骨、骷髏,引申為不可告人之秘,就是心裡有鬼啦!
現在反種族歧視已經是一個世界的潮流、共識,只不過表面上裝做不在意、避而不談,還是很多人心底仍存著這樣的偏見,不論是歧視黑人、黃種人等等,所以我們稱這種人 a closet racist 一個躲在櫃子裡的種族歧視者。
同性戀早期是見不得陽光的,因為外在環境的不友善,表明自己的性向、做自己,容易招致橫禍,因此那時就稱那樣子狀態的同性戀者為 a closet homosexual。但是自從社會對於同志的接納度漸漸提高,在台灣像是蔡康永,還有一些文藝工作者,他們傑出的表現讓大眾開始慢慢地認識同志,後來有許多同志開始敢做自己、表達自我的性傾向。
公開地認同、接納自己性向的同志,稱這種狀態、動作為 come out of the closet,走出衣櫃這個用法於是乎慢慢地被簡化成經常你我常聽見的「出櫃」(come out)一詞,是一種延伸性、譬喻性的用語,走出衣櫃看見陽光才能活出自我,是一種從負面到正面,把抽象的事情具體化的好用法。
身為同志的妳/你,用出櫃這個詞的時候,別忘了這個動作的背後有著一段晦暗的過去;身為直人的你/妳,聽到出櫃這詞的時候,請想想還有多少人渴望跟你一樣的人權,或許你身邊就有這樣的朋友,他們其實離你並不遠,只要對他們友善一點,因為你,這個社會環境會更好、更適合人居住。
2008年10月25日 星期六
The Road Not Taken
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
##CONTINUE##
沒有什麼難字。
禮拜五跟咪咪在小吃部聊天(喔,我們幾乎每個禮拜都會有兩天在小吃部裡面聊個不停),這中間會不停的跟國際學生打招呼,荷蘭來的軟絲因為一直宅在宿舍,很少看到他,經常看到瑞典來的小綠(熱愛綠色衣物,神似帥氣兩百倍哈利波特的大男孩,我每天都想看到他!),再來就是正為了各自前程而努力、徬徨的同學們。
也是有不徬徨的,但那類型裡,很多讓我頗不以為然,不提也罷。
那天早上,上完賴教授的思想史,想出國去的地方又多了個選擇:法國。免學費,吃住都有補貼(典型的社會主義國家),加把勁還可以搞個獎學金,但書是:成績要保持在前四分之一,喔,他們那邊是這樣的,第一年砍掉一半吊車尾、第二年再砍一半,第三年再砍一半,最後只會剩下四分之一的學生有機會拿到那個學位,被淘汰掉的請記得把那些補助款、獎學金乖乖繳回去 。
有沒有這麼刺激!
賴教授說的沒錯,為何要捨德法而就美帝?(話說德國不承認美國的博士學位XD)我又慢慢開始嚮往一個文化豐富的國度,而非利益取向,話說回來,賴老也提到,未來十年,這財務金融一塊會一直低迷,而且他一向最討厭那些唸MBA、整天幫銀行炒作衍伸性金融商品的畢業生,也因此,他從來不幫那些想申請MBA入學許可的學生寫推薦函。
賴老:「誰可以告訴我,他們生產了什麼?他們做的一切都建立在空的上頭,空來空去,掏空別人的荷包、把他們自己養的腦滿腸肥,你看看那些華爾街的人,個個營養過剩。賺錢的時候,誰有看過他們回饋給社會?現在垮了,要全民埋單,這些人喔...有志的青年阿,不要再去唸MBA了!你們的眼光、眼界,不該只是那樣!」
「把計財系從清華給移除掉!你們說好不好?」賴老笑著詢問。
「好!」我用力應聲。話不是我說的,我只是贊同:)。
自從開始上賴老的課,有時候會覺得自己補GMAT是去補心酸的,但不可否認的是,短短兩三個月,英文有比高中的時候還要好上許多,不論是在看文章時候要抓脈絡,還是英文的邏輯,有顯著的不同。不過這當然不太能完全拿來相提並論,畢竟準備的方向、目的都不同。
碰到新聞英語,卻又軟了...又是另外一門學問。
昨天跟咪咪提到會想去法國唸書的時候,她眼睛一亮,連忙搧風點火:一起去法國!她原本就打算去法國,而且目標似乎就是賴老畢業的那間,巴黎高等社會科學研究院。咪咪說,我也去的話,就可以一起過開心的同居生活了~瞧她樂的(指)。
用想的都很簡單、美好,我是說我啦(大笑)。
如果到出去之前,我的法文程度可以比英文還要好的話,就去!很夠意思了吧,咪咪。這些事情跟The Road Not Taken有什麼關係?是這樣的,當我們聊到這裡的時候,話鋒一轉,其實心裡是不安的,覺得自己把餅畫太大,到頭來說不定只是一場空。
以前我就提過好幾次,這裡不想再重複,略提便罷。簡單來說,我認為有理想有目標,跟有能力,是兩回事,兩者不相符,不論是前者大於後者,或顛倒,都不會有什麼好結果。看著過去兩三年在大學裡的表現和曾遇過的事情,只覺得自己的情況,是前者超越後者,換句話說就近似眼高手低。
咪咪:「現在下定論還太早。」
有時後忍不住去想,如果去年的暑假,真的捨清華而就東吳德文,會是什麼光景?事情會不會更不一樣?對未來是否會有不同的看法?......The Road Not Taken!剛剛那些問號,都沒有答案,但還有些事情是已知的:如果去了東吳,我就不會有機會參與校慶,不會遇上咪咪、逮樓、大龜;如果去了東吳,我不會有機會到賴教授的課堂上,接受他的enlightenment;如果我也跟風(有一點點「路徑依賴」的感覺,path dependence),繳錢、進補習班、擠台灣研究所窄門、拿一個學位、上班、工作、每天看著社會亂象、上網po文洩憤,咪咪說:「如果你選擇了這樣,那麼我們也不會變得這麼好,也不會有這麼多事情可以討論、可以聊,我們就只會在校慶結束後,慢慢地退到nodding acquaintance的位置。」
Just I chose not to do so, and that has made all the difference.
想做點不一樣的事情、想探索一些不一樣的東西,著眼點不是利,是單純的求知慾、想冒險的心,這是我的初衷,莫忘。但是誰又知道幾年後是不是會遇上什麼不可測的事情,然後屁股拍拍又轉向美帝,囫圇地幫自己套上個MBA的光環便了結?
沒有人知道,只能在當下,可以保持初衷的時候,儘可能的堅定這個念頭。有咪咪在身邊,她應該會一直、不斷的、重複的提醒著我這一切,善。雖然感覺有點蠢,但,「機會是留給準備好的人」,這句話,是支持我現在、近期幾年內,不斷地讓自己有更多skill、豐富自己的動力,我相信...機會有可能會留個位置,給我?!
:>
2007年11月23日 星期五
新衣服將入手
也有可能是兩件,花花跟喵喵說要補送我生日禮物(雖然那天已經過了有一點久XD),說要讓我挑一瓶,可是我怕會挑到太貴的,因為我對嗅覺這方面實在是有點近乎變態與不合邏輯的挑剔。
今天跟總經老師璇璇談了一點關於我自己的事情(容我下一篇再述),不太好意思,耽誤了老師跟爸媽吃飯的時間,但老師真的幫我釐清了一些自己的想法和以後,現在對於那些事情我心裡稍微有個底。
與老師道別之後,我驅車前往市區的莎莎(SASA為知名的香水販賣連鎖店,同時販賣許多保養品等),試了昨天提到的那些款香水,就在我幾乎都試聞過兩遍之後,老實說,味道都不是很合我意。
##CONTINUE##
CK Be/one:前者真的是外勞香,後者真的我聞過三千七百五十六遍,路上到處有人用...;CK 永恆男香:味道很普通,不討厭但也沒有心動;CK 永恆女香:是我討厭的那種粉味。
TOMMY 經典女香:茉莉茉莉滿天下~有一種整個人泡在光泉茉莉蜜茶的感覺,不過還算清新;TOMMY 經典男香:聞起來太俏皮、太濃,我聞過偷米的沐浴乳,同個味道,但是香水我有點難接受,有點像很常跑夜店的運動男孩XD。
Kenzo 罌粟花:太粉,完全不適合男生;Bvlgari 天之驕女水晶:沒什麼特色,味道很一般;Bvlgari 大吉嶺男香:胡椒的氣味讓我有印象,適合抽菸的人使用。
D&G light:聞起來不錯,BBS個版的版友NAOMI推薦這個,不過我覺得跟其他款的聞起來有一點像,辨識度不太高,當然鼻子好的人就分的出來,不過這品我覺得不適合我用:)。
這時我在新竹莎莎玩膩了,發現竟然找不著我還沒聞的Paul Smith - Story男香!原來它們家沒有進Paul Smith的東西。好吧,那我就直奔一樣在附近的洛億!果然被我找到了~~聞了之後,大為驚人!!完全就是我會喜歡的味道!從前味、中味一直到後味,如果我身邊有人噴這個,我百分之百會黏上去聞個不停!!
我要來生火了,哈哈~首先提供Paul Smith的官方網站,再來是我很雞婆地提供Paul Smith香水的頁面,再來讓我引用一些我喜歡以即將入手的幾瓶香水的介紹。
香水1976這個網站提供了很多資訊,同時也提供線上購物,價格非常實惠,我比較的基準是以:公司貨、專櫃價格這兩者去比較,1976的價格真的好上很多,也常常有特惠品。
首先!我即將買入手的:Paul Smith - Story(前面是官網介紹,後面為香水1976的中文介紹,之後本篇介紹Paul Smith兩三款香水都踩取一樣的方式),這是一瓶男香,昨天我在批踢踢的香水版問版眾時,有人說看我的星座以及一些資料,一定會喜歡這瓶,不出所料,我愛上它了!
Paul Smith - Story
香調:綠草花香調
前味:葡萄柚、佛手柑、長春藤、香根草
中味:茉莉花、綠薔薇
後味:麝香、礦石、琥珀、西洋杉木
以下引述官網的文字:
Dazzling notes of grapefruit, crisp bergamont and green ivy provide a succulent, lushly humid accord that provides contrast and invigorates the vetiver. The story builds with sexy transparent jasmine and green rose notes, florals that are both provocatively different yet bring harmony to the blend.
The bottle is fashioned like a book with the glass thick enough to allow the green glow of old apothecary bottles to shine through.
其實女生用也很適合,這瓶味道算蠻中性的,前味的葡萄柚非常清香,然後慢慢味道的轉變,讓我為之著迷、瘋狂。前中後三味非常協調與不同,很棒!
同時我也試聞了一下Paul Smith - Rose,這瓶女香很有趣,前中後三味都是純粹乾淨的玫瑰味,台灣最近才進口,代理商把價格定的非常高。Rose的味道不像一般香水的玫瑰味會嗆鼻,是很乾淨無雜質、純粹的那種玫瑰芬芳,我個人很喜歡這款,試香的時候阿姨說她很意外,因為她覺得我很適合這款XD。
以下引述一段官網的文字:
Fresh. Modern. Airy. Individual. Addictive. Sensual. The Rose at the heart of this fragrance bears Paul Smith’s name. It was cultivated and given as a gift from Paul’s wife for a birthday gift. This proved to be an inspiration for a fragrance
The Paul Smith Rose is a potently fragrant, cochineal pink bloom, with a tight peony centre and full outer centre was first presented in 2006 at the Chelsea Flower Show.
No blooms are harvested crushed and distilled – instead the living flower is isolated in a glass bell and equipment ‘inhales’ the scent. The rose’s scent has been blended with Turkish rose oil and green tea with a sparkling halo of violet and magnolia flowers. A woody accord, with touches of cedar, provides depth and structure, which along with soft husks, give it an addictive quality
A rose by any other name might be something you expect…. Rose by Paul Smith is something altogether different. Fresh and individual, modern and memorable
不過Rose的公司貨、專櫃價或是新竹洛億販賣的價格,都非常不可親...50ml的就至少要一千五左右,更別提100ml的要價兩千三百多。雖然這個價格比起Hermes的香水還差的遠XD,但也真的是頗貴。
去市區試香的同時,我也身負幫學長挺挺找一瓶香水的任務,可惜我沒聞到這瓶:Paul Smith - London,可能是因為Paul Smith香水剛開始引進台灣,不敢一次引進太多吧,這瓶我沒找到,公館的喬雅不知道會不會有。
Paul Smith - London
香調:木質花香調
前味:綠柑橘、紫羅蘭花葉、肉荳蔻、紅黑胡椒
中味:薄荷葉、茉莉花、薰衣草
後味:白蘭地、檀香、香根草、琥珀、薰草豆
以下引述一段官網的文字:
This sensual fragrance sparkles with green mandarin, violet flowers and leaves the crispness sustained with mint and a touch of jasmine and lavender. Key note vetyver. The warm base, with a vintage brandy accord, Australian sandlewood, tonka beans and amber.
The clean lines of the apothecary bottle are complimented in cobalt blue.
啊~~實在太黯然太銷魂了啦!!!
好,打住,反正我確定會購入一瓶Paul Smith - Story,以一個非常優惠的價格~因為某間店正在優惠,哪間店?上批踢踢Perfume板看就會知道,版標都改了呢XD
至於Paul Smith - Rose...我可以跟花花還有喵喵說我想要這瓶嗎?科科。
2007年6月7日 星期四
[轉錄] What Is Your Life's Blueprint ?
這篇文章,高中那時迴紋針有印給我們看過,雖不能說是記憶猶新,但記得有看過影片之類的,對於金恩博士演講的慷慨激昂倒是印象頗深。
What Is Your Life's Blueprint?
http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/mlk/king/words/blueprint.html
Six months before he was assassinated, King spoke to a group of students at Barratt Junior High School in Philadelphia on October 26, 1967.
##CONTINUE##
I want to ask you a question, and that is: What is your life's blueprint?
Whenever a building is constructed, you usually have an architect who draws a blueprint, and that blueprint serves as the pattern, as the guide, and a building is not well erected without a good, solid blueprint.
Now each of you is in the process of building the structure of your lives, and the question is whether you have a proper, a solid and a sound blueprint.
I want to suggest some of the things that should begin your life's blueprint. Number one in your life's blueprint, should be a deep belief in your own dignity, your worth and your own somebodiness. Don't allow anybody to make you feel that you're nobody. Always feel that you count. Always feel that you have worth, and always feel that your life has ultimate significance.
Secondly, in your life's blueprint you must have as the basic principle the determination to achieve excellence in your various fields of endeavor. You're going to be deciding as the days, as the years unfold what you will do in life — what your life's work will be. Set out to do it well.
And I say to you, my young friends, doors are opening to you--doors of opportunities that were not open to your mothers and your fathers — and the great challenge facing you is to be ready to face these doors as they open.
Ralph Waldo Emerson, the great essayist, said in a lecture in 1871, "If a man can write a better book or preach a better sermon or make a better mousetrap than his neighbor, even if he builds his house in the woods, the world will make a beaten path to his door."
This hasn't always been true — but it will become increasingly true, and so I would urge you to study hard, to burn the midnight oil; I would say to you, don't drop out of school. I understand all the sociological reasons, but I urge you that in spite of your economic plight, in spite of the situation that you're forced to live in — stay in school.
And when you discover what you will be in your life, set out to do it as if God Almighty called you at this particular moment in history to do it. don't just set out to do a good job. Set out to do such a good job that the living, the dead or the unborn couldn't do it any better.
If it falls your lot to be a street sweeper, sweep streets like Michelangelo painted pictures, sweep streets like Beethoven composed music, sweep streets like Leontyne Price sings before the Metropolitan Opera. Sweep streets like Shakespeare wrote poetry. Sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will have to pause and say: Here lived a great street sweeper who swept his job well. If you can't be a pine at the top of the hill, be a shrub in the valley. Be the best little shrub on the side of the hill.
Be a bush if you can't be a tree. If you can't be a highway, just be a trail. If you can't be a sun, be a star. For it isn't by size that you win or fail. Be the best of whatever you are.
--From the estate of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
2007年4月29日 星期日
網頁小遊戲
室友人很好,提供了我個小遊戲殺時間,現在沒空破關,只有稍微嘗試了一下,提供大家去試試看。遊戲方法很簡單,有八個元素任你擺放,但是每個只能擺放一次,擺放順序由你決定,最後會依照擺放的元素順序,跑一次流程,看看你擺放元素的順序是否能打贏大魔王~
http://www.ninjakiwi.com/bloons.html
熱情熊寶又推薦一個殺時間小遊戲,這個就也很簡單反正就是把各種擺好的氣球用有限的飛鏢射破,飛鏢的發射力道、方向是可以調的,射出去的角度跟飛鏢的方向等等都是有一定的規則,氣球的擺放也有各種方式,大家可以多試試看~
2007年3月28日 星期三
Dream of Language Learning
##CONTINUE##
In fact, I want to learn more languages. Why? Maybe someone will think it ridiculous, but I mean it. I want to speak not English but much more other kind languages. Such as Japanese Russian French German Spanish, sounds pompous but I can seriously tell you this. Communicating with foreigners in their mother language is my dream. I don't know how to explain what's my motive for this childish dream, but there is one thing needless to say:"I've given up this dream since I yielded to Mom's reguests".What're the requests? There's only one, and that is:"Languages can't make money! Business institute or something like economics will help you do this !" Yeah, maybe these majors really make some money, but in my point of view, those money shouldn't be more important than my dream. I don't mean to be proficient in literature or phonetics, but at least I can speak and read. So that I can talk, talk in many ways. Sounds impractical but that's truly my dream. Now it has become the donkey's carrot which could be chased but will never be seized. In my position now, the dream will always be a dream if I don't put something into practice.
Grown-ups always say that:"True to yourself, and do your best!" But they don't really mean it. "Everyone is special! " Change another way to say then no one is (special). In the cartoon "The Incredibles", when Dash asked Elastic girl (his monther) why he can't do his best (Dash is an incredible boy with dashes, and he meant run as fast as he can on the a track and field meet) , she replied:"Right now,honey, the world just want us to fit in and fit in ,and we just have to be like everybody else". Hummm.... Let's think about it. I got a sentense to sum up this long section, that is:
When everyone is told they are 'special' then no one is.
Back to language learning, I want to change my major from economics to foreign language. It's a pity that my results of study in this economics department are poor, so I am not able to fill the bill about changing major.Maybe you will say that it's not necessary to change major,but I have to say that I spend most of the time studying the main subjects in order to not be flunked. For this reason, I can't join clubs because it cost too much times and spirit.
I am confused now:"A dream is important, or a diploma is better ?". The only thing I'm sure is that I hate economics even though economic models or theories will bring me money.
BTW My English is poor now, and I'm trying to grab the feeling back. If there are errors, please leave a message to me. Thanks for your help.
2007年3月27日 星期二
Mathematics or Economics ?
I feel uncomfortable about this situation. I didn't know that economics contain so much math ! When I chose this department as my major, nobody told me that I will have to learn so much mathematics! By the time I graduated from senior high, I told myself not to touch any kind of math anymore.
##CONTINUE##
In fact, about 70% of my classmates have the same concept like me. We think we were cheated. Economics isn't the way we thought it would be. It's social science, and economist proves and explains the entire phenomenon by using mathematical methods. No students who major in economics can escape from the hell constructed with hundreds and thousands of models and countless hypothesis. All of the mathematics used in economics is indispensable, because we can't build a skyscraper on the air.
Mathematics has made me loath since I was senior high. I have thought that once I get into a department, which is, not belongs to financial or business kind, I would be free from the fear of math. I have been stuck here for one and half years, and now I start considering about my future: “I really want to graduate with nothing in my head ? No skills no dreams".
I want to change this situation now, but how could I? Please let me know your opinions if you're in leisure.
BTW My English is poor now, and I'm trying to grab the feeling back. If there are errors, please leave a message to me. Thanks for your help.